When your ex girlfriend wants to be friends, it can be confusing to say the least. You are probably wondering why does my ex girlfriend want to be friends for starters and I am going to tell you exactly why in most cases. I have been the ex girlfriend!
If you don’t care one way or another if you get her back or not, this won’t really be an issue for you. If you do care however, staying friends with her can be torture. It’s a constant reminder and it makes moving on difficult and it becomes quite easy to find false hope when your ex girlfriend wants to be your friend.
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When Your Ex Girlfriend Wants to be Friends She Wants a Safety Net!
Believe it or not, being the one to end a relationship is just about as hard as being the one who has just had a relationship ended with them against their wishes. It’s tough. It’s scary. When you end a relationship, you are stepping out into the unknown.
This is why many often even prolong a breakup. The thought of going into the unknown causes more fear than staying in their comfort zones. Their comfort zone being you.
Ex girlfriends will try to remain your friend to keep a safe track back into that comfort zone and you become their safety net. If you want her back, being her safety net is not the way to go.
When Your Ex Girlfriend Wants to Be Friends, She Wants to Ease Her Guilt.
When a girl breaks up with you, she feels bad about it. Ask her girl friends. They will tell you how many times she has said “I feel so bad about hurting him”. She feels guilt. It’s a normal human emotion.
If you agree to remain friends with her, then she can feel better. She gets validation and relief from her guilt. If she broke up with you, allow her to manage her own emotions please.
It’s normal that she is going to have moments of missing you. It happens. If you stay friends with her, you give her relief during these moments. Then she picks herself back up afterwards and keep moving on. Without you.
When you remain friends with your ex girlfriend, you ease her transition back into the single world while you prolong your own. If you want any chance of getting your ex girlfriend back, staying friends with her is not the way to go.
You are actually helping her detach from you when you stay friends with an ex. If you want to be her friend, heal yourself first and revisit the friendship later. She can’t miss you or really reflect on the relationship if you are still available for her every call, request and text.
Most reconciliations that last happen later down the road when both parties have had time to reflect and calm their emotions. Anything either of you do at this point early in a break up is from a place of emotions.
So next time you think about reaching out or texting your ex girlfriend, remember this post!
When your ex girlfriend wants to be friends, if you seek a reunion, decline the offer for now and follow this plan here.
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